Love and consumerism collide on Valentine’s Day, a holiday where emotions meet marketing

Every Feb.14, the world is swept into a whirlwind of roses, heart-shaped chocolates, teddy bears and glittering gift boxes—symbols that society has deemed representative of love. Store shelves overflow with these items, carrying an implicit message: If you are not willing to spend hundreds of dollars on these items for your significant other, your love is not true. As Valentine’s Day approaches, people often contemplate whether the day is a genuine celebration of love, or if it has become a marketing machine designed to extract money from their pockets. Is the love we feel for our partners being overshadowed by consumerism, or are we simply victims of clever advertising? 

Valentine’s Day has been celebrated in various forms for centuries, originating as a day to honour St. Valentine, a Christian martyr. Over time, it became associated with romantic love, particularly during the Middle Ages when courtly love flourished. However, the modern version of Valentine’s Day took shape in the 20th century with the rise of mass production and marketing. What was once a celebration of meaningful connections has evolved into a commercial force. According to the National Retail Federation, Valentine’s Day is now one of the largest commercial holidays in the world. In 2024 alone, consumers in North America were projected to spend a staggering $25.8 billion on gifts, dinners, and experiences, with the average middle-class person spending $185.81—that’s $371.62 per middle-class relationship! 

This consumerist nature of Valentine’s Day is impossible to ignore. Advertisements for jewellery, perfumes, flowers and luxury experiences dominate every media channel in the weeks leading up to Feb. 14. Valentine’s Day has become a celebration not just of love, but of consumption. As stores fill with roses, chocolates, and plush toys, the holiday carries the unspoken expectation that love must be demonstrated through expensive gifts.  

“Valentine’s Day really doesn’t feel like it’s actually about romance. Don’t get me wrong, I’ll plan something romantic for it just as much as the next person. But it really does feel like you have to buy people things, especially if you’re in a relationship.  There’s just so much pressure to buy things for people. I make the stuff I give, but it really isn’t viewed as the same. It’s disappointing to feel like you’ve got to spend money. It cheapens when you choose to, right?” said Markus Hansson, a first-year social work major, highlighting the emotional weight many feel about the commercial pressures surrounding the day. 

For many, the pressure to buy an expensive gift or plan an elaborate date night can overshadow the true sentiment behind the holiday. This expectation, reinforced by endless advertisements and societal norms, makes individuals question whether their gestures are rooted in affection or merely an attempt to meet external expectations. 

The pressure to purchase expensive gifts is compounded by the phenomenon known as the “pink tax.” The term refers to the higher prices charged for products marketed specifically toward women compared to virtually identical products for men. From razors and personal care items to perfumes and even clothing, companies capitalize on traditional gender roles and societal expectations to inflate prices for “feminine” items. Around Valentine’s Day, this disparity becomes particularly noticeable, as advertisers often position women as the primary recipients of gifts, reinforcing the idea that their love and appreciation come at a financial premium. This practice underscores how consumerism has shaped the holiday, turning acts of love into opportunities for businesses to exploit spending habits. 

The commercialization of Valentine’s Day has made love synonymous with consumption. While gifts can hold meaning, they often come with the implication that love must be measured in material terms. “Many people feel that the amount they spend on gifts for their partner measures how much they love them. If they can’t or are unwilling to buy luxury items, they may feel inadequate or that their love isn’t enough,” said Kristin Kinzie, a first-year social work major. This notion has been heavily reinforced by corporations, which have successfully linked luxury items and lavish experiences to romantic affection, blurring the lines between genuine emotion and financial exchange. 

“I’ve never been one to buy into the commercial aspect of Valentine’s Day,” said Ania Donachy-Taylor, another social work student in their second year. “Valentine’s Day is more about proving that you can buy nice things for a romantic partner than actually showing love.” 

For many, Valentine’s Day isn’t just about romantic love; it’s also an opportunity to celebrate friendships and the bonds we share with those closest to us. The rise of “Galentine’s Day,” a celebration of female friendship, is just one example of how people have redefined the holiday to focus on appreciation and connection, regardless of romantic status. It’s a chance to spend time with loved ones, create lasting memories and show gratitude for the important people in our lives. These celebrations offer a refreshing reminder that Valentine’s Day doesn’t have to be limited to couples—it’s about cherishing all kinds of love. 

For others,  the pomp and grandeur of Valentine’s Day are precisely what makes it special. The holiday offers an opportunity to create unforgettable moments, whether through surprise proposals, grand romantic gestures or extravagant celebrations. For these individuals, the financial aspects of Valentine’s Day are part of the experience, not a detraction from its meaning. 

“I love going all out for Galentine’s Day,” said Gisselle Yevenes, a Laurier mom. “It’s about creating memories and showing my girls how much I appreciate them. Sure, there’s a commercial element, but it’s also fun. I want to show them how they deserve to be treated, whether by me or their future partners. In the end, it’s not just about the gifts but the thought and effort behind them.” 

For those seeking a more meaningful approach to Valentine’s Day, relationship experts such as Dr. John Gottman, a renowned psychologist specializing in relationships, and Dr. Gary Chapman, author of The 5 Love Languages, suggest focusing on the intangible aspects of love. Instead of splurging on costly gifts, couples can embrace personal, low-cost experiences that celebrate their unique bond. From heartfelt letters and homemade dinners to shared walks in nature, these simple gestures often carry more emotional weight than any expensive purchase. 

“I believe that Valentine’s Day is ultimately what you make of it,” saidSarah Calara, a first-year criminology major. “With social media playing a major role in marketing the holiday, consumers are bound to buy into the love. But I also think people wouldn’t celebrate the holiday without a valid reason, like having someone to love. Overall, both love and consumerism play a role.” 

This balance between love and consumerism is also influenced by traditional gender roles, which play a significant part in how people navigate Valentine’s Day. Historically, women have been the primary recipients of gifts and romantic gestures, reinforcing the idea that their worth is tied to material displays of affection. Men, in turn, are expected to prove their love through extravagant gifts or actions, creating pressure to meet these societal expectations. These gender norms shape the way we approach the holiday, as the expectation to give and receive certain types of gifts becomes intertwined with traditional notions of masculinity and femininity. 

However, as more people challenge these long-standing gender roles, there is a growing movement toward redefining what Valentine’s Day can be. Women are increasingly rejecting the idea that their worth is measured by expensive gifts, and men are pushing back against the pressure to overspend or perform grand gestures to show affection. Instead, many are embracing a more balanced and personal approach to love, one that focuses on meaningful experiences rather than material possessions. One notable shift is the rise of the “Men Deserve Flowers Too” TikTok trend, where women are now gifting flowers to their male partners, challenging the long-standing tradition that associates flowers with women. This simple yet impactful gesture helps break down gendered expectations of love, promoting the idea that affection and appreciation should not be confined to one gender, but can be expressed freely between all people. 

As Feb. 14 continues to dominate the retail calendar, it’s clear that consumerism is an undeniable force. Yet, the true essence of Valentine’s Day must not be defined by materialism. Whether you choose to indulge in the festivities or opt for a quieter celebration, the most important thing is to remember the holiday’s core purpose: Love, connection and cherishing the bonds with those who matter most. After all, no gift is greater than the time, attention and affection we offer to one another. 

This story was originally published in Volume 24, Issue 6 on February 6, 2025